11 days.

It's been eleven days since I've posted - which has felt like forever.
But each time I sit down to write out a post,
I'm pulled away by my own ideas.

I've been inspired lately, which is hard sometimes,
to crochet every little thing that pops into my head
because for once I have the motivation to sit down
and get it cranked out before work,
and because for once we have the financial ability
to purchase the supplies I need
to bring my ideas to fruition.

So I've been crocheting and
crocheting my little fingers down to the bone,
trying to get ready for a big shop update on August 31st.
I'm only about a third of the way through
all my ideas I want to have made by then,
but I believe in myself, and my abilities,
and this coming week brings a smaller workload with it,
and thus more time for crocheting.

The loveliest thing though,
is that when I tell people about
what I want to get out of this update,
they're supportive,
and immediately start asking about what I'm making,
and asking if I can make one like this or like that
for them.

It's a great feeling - that I am good at what I do.
And it's the validation I've needed for a little while now.



And I think the second I feel satisfied
with the amount of things I've made for this update,
I'm going to start looking into how I can help
a charity very near and dear to my heart
with my crocheting. More on that later, though.

I've got to get back to crocheting,
before I lose the better half of my day to the internet.

But for now, I'm going to leave you with this quote.

"Success isn't a result of spontaneous combustion. 
You must set yourself on fire." 
~Arnold H. Glasow


I'll explain later.

I'm feeling

lost and forgotten.
and upset.

I love when my hands hurt
from doing what I love
and I miss that kind of hurt,
because instead, my heart hurts.
My heart hurts when I think
about the fact that crocheting
may never get me where I want to be.
I might never get to make my own schedule
- to wake up and craft and craft and sell 
until it's time to go to bed,
and then start all over again.


I need to get inspired.
I want someone to believe in my abilities.